The following is an additional section set up by some of the bardic members of the DoA.

To the tune of the mice on the Marvellous Mechanical Mouse Organ from Bagpuss (also known as 'Sumer is Icumen In).

We will hit them
We will hit them
We will split them in two two two.
We will batter them
On the field we'll splatter them
We'll leave them black and blue blue blue.

Written by Lady Freydis Thofinsdottir

'Diamonds are a girls best friend' was originally by Marilyn Monroe, but it recently came back in the film Moulin Rouge. I tried my hand at an adaptation...

"Schlagers are a Girl's Best Friend"

A kiss on the hand may be quite continental
but schlagers are a girl's best friend.
A kiss may be grand, but it won't pay the rental on
your camping site (but come to that, nor will a fight!)

Men will grow cold as we grow bold
and we'll all win our bouts in the end
And Del Tin or Hanwei, our blades will be true
Schlagers are a girl's best friend!

There may come a time when a lass needs a champion
but schlagers are a girl's best friend
There may come a time when a gentleman fighter thinks
you're 'awful nice'- then grab your blade and beat him twice!

Schlagers are a girl's best, schlagers are a girl's
best, schlagers are a girl's best friend....Take That!

Adapted by Christy Mackenzie